I’m not sure if this Top Ten will read anything like how it sounded when we did this on-air. IMHO, it was one of the Top Tens I laughed the most in! Obviously the 2 geeks had fun with the topic. Thanks of course to the great entries you guys sent in. It’s one of those love-it-or-hate-it kind of kalokohan. In case you missed it, a little backgrounder: We named the Tagalog Edward: Eddie Boy Munggo (apparently, “cullen” is a type of legume) and the Tagalog Bella: Bella Bibe (swan, bibe, get it? I know, hwe hwe.) It started out a couple of days earlier when Gino and I did our “coffee, tea…or BLOOD!” shtick. Again, you had to hear it to get the weirdness of it all. It’s the 1st Top Ten for 2009!
January 2, 2009 → The Top Ten Bad Lines From A Fictitious Tagalog Version Of Twilight – Geyp
- Mr. Perk – Bella: “Eddie Boy, bakit ang lamig mo?” Eddie Boy: “Sige, hawakan mo lang, iinit din yan…”
- Monoceros – “At ngayon, minahal ng leon ang anak ng tupa.”
- Astroby/Cloie – “At nagdala ka pa ng merienda…DINUGUAN!”
- Father Marcus/Danayamihan – “At nagdala ka pa ng merienda. Chippy…chipipay kang bruha ka!”
- Jose de vengenge – Bella: “Eddie Boy wag, may ‘visitor’ ako…” Eddie Boy: “Eh di mas okey!”
- Astroboy – Police Chief Bibe: “Wag paglaruan ang puso ng babae dahil nag-iisa lang yan. Yung dede pwede kasi dalawa!”
- Yñaki – Eddie Boy: “Hi, ako si Eddie Boy.” Bella: “Arooo, dugu-dugo gang ka no?!?”
- SC – Bella: “Nagugutom ka na ba? Bilis, kagatin mo na ko, Eddie Boy, kagatin mo na ko!” Eddie Boy: “Ewww…you’re hilaw.”
- Pony/Gary – Eddie Boy: (takes off shirt) “Eto ang dahilan kung bakit di kami nagbibilad sa araw…” Bella: “Man-boobs?”
- SC – (Eddie Boy gets a blood sample from Bella) Bella: “Para saan yan?” Eddie Boy: “Gusto ko lang malaman kung ‘type’ kita.”
- Pepesan – (Theme song sung to the tune of Disturbia) “Vam vampira vam vam vampira…”
- Kathleen – Eddie Boy: “Bella, kumain ka ba ng kuwitis?” Bella: “Hindi, bakit?” Eddie Boy: “Kasi pag ngumiti ka…may spark.”
- Edward’s Kitten – Bella: “Bakit kahapon itim ang mata mo, ngayon dilaw?” Eddie Boy: “Sa wakas, nalaman mo rin ang sikreto ko…HEPA.”
- Kathleen – Eddie Boy: “Laro tayo.” Bella: “Sige, kahit ano, wag lang taguan.” Eddie Boy: “Bakit?” Bella: “Kasi a good man like you is hard to find.”
- SC – Bella: “Pag tinitignan mo ko ng malagkit, anong nakikita mo?” Eddie Boy: “Red Cross.”
- Red Fox – Bella: “I know what you are.” Eddie Boy: “Say it out loud.” Bella: “Bading! Bading! Bading!”
- Greg – Bella: “Ang putla ng balat mo…” Eddie Boy: “Gaga, nagkamali lang ako ng bili ng shade ng Ever Bilena foundation ko!
- Specialist – Bella: “Maputla ang balat mo…kakaiba ang bilis mo…at ang lakas mo…….pa-cheeseburger ka naman! Burger! Burger! Burger!”
- No name – (Dra Belo saw Eddie Boy’s pale skin and offered a free facial) Eddie Boy: “Sorry…but only Bella touches my skin.”
- Boknoi – (In the middle of sucking Bella’s blood, Eddie Boy suddenly stops.) Bella: “O…bakit ka tumigil?” Eddie Boy: “Wala ka bang puto diyan?”