In this age of telecommunication, text messages are an inescapable facet of everyday life. Just last Friday, as I was about to meet my friends in Greenbelt, my phone lost its signal and I realized how dependent we’ve become to our attached to the hip gadget. I had no idea how to tell my friends that I was there and how we’ll meet. Sometimes texts are annoying, sometimes they’re indispensable.
February 5, 2008 → The Top Ten Most Memorable Texts You’ve Ever Received
- Silven – Husband: “Luv promise, simula ngayon iiwan ko na ang mga kabit ko.” Wife: “Wow, thank you luv! Ako naman I promise, ang next nating anak, ikaw na ama!”
- Joel Paul – “Never explain yourself to anyone because the person who likes you doesn’t need it, and the one who dislikes you won’t believe it, & the one who doesn’t care about you won’t care what you say.”
- Krisvan – “Nanonood ako ng mga ants na naglalakad sa wall. Kahit busy sila, they still stop and communicate. Sana tayo ring mga tao, we could be more like the ants – naglalakad sa walls!”
- No name – Dumating yung ngongo sa bahay nila at tinakpan niya ang mata ng misis nya. Ngongo: “Nges oo?” Wife: “Buwisit ‘to, ‘nges oo, nges oo’ ka pa diyan, eh ikaw lang naman ang ngongo dito!”
- Josie/Tata – “Dear GOD, please don’t lead me into temptation…I already know the way”
- ms_mo – A playboy died. During the mass: Priest: “He’s an honest guy, a good husband and a family man!” Wife: (whispered to her son) “Anak, tignan mo nga baka di na si papa mo yung nakaburol.”
- SPY SHADOW – 4 job applicants were asked: “What is the fastest thing in the world?” The German said, “Thought”. The American said, “A blink of an eye”. The Aussie said, “Light”. The Pinoy said, “Diarrhea!” Pinoy: “Lit mi eksplin. Dis murning, I hab istumak ek, I run to di tuylet but bipor I kud tink, blenk, or eben swits on di lyt, tangna, der was syet en my pants olridi, su past!”
- No name – 1) “Aanhin mo ang gwapo, kung mas malandi pa sa ‘yo?” 2) “Walang matinong lalake sa malanding kumpare.” 3) “Sa hinaba-haba ng prosisyon, bading din pala ang magiging karelasyon.” 4) “Matalino man ang bading, napeperahan pa rin.” 5) “Ang di marun0ng magmahal sa sariling wika, sa callcenter naglipana.”
- bi-b0n – “Virginity is neither a sign of purity nor dignity. It’s a sign of a lack of opportunity.”
- Gela – BATA: “Wala akong kwentang anak para sa inyo! Lahat nalang ng gawin ko mali! Di nyo na ako mahal!” AMA: “Nagkakamali ka anak…” BATA: “Syet, mali nanaman ako!”
- No name – Woman with sick baby went to the clinic. Doctor: “Is he bottlefed?” Woman: “Breastfed po, doc.” (Doctor starts squeezing the woman’s nipples) Doctor: “That’s why he’s sick, you’re not producing milk.” Woman : “Yaya lang ako, doc! YAYA!”
- Linsauke – Celebrity quote: “Noodle! Noodle! NOODLE!!!” – Manny Pacquiao on “Deal or No Deal”.
- No name – DOC: “Hubad na iha, wag kang matakot. I will not take advantage of you, general check-up lang ‘to.” GIRL: “Saan ko po ilalagay ang panty ko?” DOC: “Diyan lang sa tabi ng brief ko…”
- Yñaki – News Flash: “Snow White, thrown out of Disneyland! She pulled up her skirt, sat on Pinocchio’s face and shouted, ‘Lie, you bastard, lie!'”
- Errol/Alle – If asked, “Kumusta sexlife?” Ang tamang sagot, “Eto, self-supporting.”
- Xtian Aguilera – “Sana radyo ka nalang, para pag naririnig kitang kumanta, puwede kitang patayin.”
- Loi Pogi – From a gay admirer: “Roses are red, pickles are green, I like your legs, and the cucumber in between.”
- Jedi Master: “Beauty is only superfical. It’s the character that makes a pers0n who they really are” – motto yan ng mga PANGET!
- Roben – In a coffee shop, an attractive lady was having a drink. A guy walked up to her & said: “Bond…James Bond.” She looked up & answered: “Lost…Get Lost.”
- SPY SHADOW – “Whenever you are stressed and about to give up, remember: ‘stressed’ is just ‘desserts’ spelled backwards – so it’s just a piece of cake!”
- Ian024 – TITSER: “Who can give an example of a tag question?” PUPIL: “My teacher is beautiful, isn’t she?” TITSER: “Very good! Itagalog mo nga!” PUPIL: “Si ma’am ay maganda, hindi naman diba?”
- ALLE – “Ang boses mo, parang ibon. Ang sarap tiradurin!”
- Enihs – “Math tells us 3 of the saddest love stories. Tangent lines who had 1 chance to meet and then parted forever. Parallel lines who were never meant to meet. And asymptotes who can get closer and closer but will never be together.”
- Bh0w – Pinaka common mistake ng isang girl during a job interview ay ang pagsagot ng… “KAHIT ANUNG POSISYON PO SIR, BASTA MAKAPASOK LANG.”
- Dreamweaver – MMDA (w/ pen & ticket) to traffic violator: “Name?” Foreign Driver: “Wilhelm von Corgrinski Papakovitz.” MMDA: Ah…sige…next time don’t overspeeding again, ha?”
- Bebang – “Tandaan mo anak ang batang sinungaling ay di na tatangkad, uusli ang ipin, liliit ang binti at tutubuan ng nunal sa mukha.” – Diosdado Macapagal
- Mabaysay – “Wouldn’t it be cool and make more sense if the life cycle was all backwards? You should die 1st and get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get a silver watch and you go to work. You work 40 years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do booze, sex, you party, then you get ready for high school. You go to grade school. You become a kid, you play, you have no worries. You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, spend your last 9 months floating. And you finish off as an orgasm.”
- Joel Paul – “Never let the things you want, make you forget the things you already have.”
- Loipogi – “Rooster and cat goes over a bridge. Cat slips and falls in the river. Rooster can’t stop laughing. The moral of the story: wherever there’s a wet pussy, there’s a happy cock.”
Your top tens make my day. =)
#24 is a classic.. hahahaha
#27 is the best … ^_^
i love the diosdado macapagal entry hahaha!
I liked number 25 it was sooo funny. so was the what is the fastest thing in the world. I love this blog.
Im a student who studies in Mandaluyong. a walking distance to strata 2000. I listen to you everytime i go to school.
in all fairness, nag-slow down processing ko ng slight with the noodles ah! hehe
i remember this one, it makes me smiling all day,
that’s why my girl ask me if i’m beginning to loose my mind….
this is really one outrageous top ten….
arigatou gusaimas chico kun….
it really made my day especially #7….
i really laugh my heart out….
keep it up and more power to your show….
haha. Ganda ng top ten
i just thought you might enjoy this…
http://blairbitchbunny.blogspot.com/2008/03/blog-post.html
i love the “yaya lang ako doc, YAYA!” entry the best!
i also like Joel Paul’s entries!
Loi Pogi says PLUG KO LANG ANG POLITICAL HUMOR BLOG KO:
http://www.professionalheckler.wordpress.com
salamat chico
hahaha!!..once again..isa sa mga top ten na sobra kong na-enjoy..
grabe, laugh trip!!!…
i was listening when you did this top ten..
pero kahit ngayon di pa rin ako maawat sa kakatawa…
hehe
HI CHICO… i once texted u about my letter to tito ricky lo re: OUR top 10 that has been circulating in cyberspace. Here’s the rejoinder of tito ricky in his philippine star column last january 26:
• From reader Loi Reyes Landicho, also one of the writers of The Ricky Lo Exclusives (TRLE): The Filipino translations of English movies that you published in Funfare last Thursday were culled from an episode of the radio show The Morning Rush hosted by Chico and Delamar on RX 93.1, sent by the witty listeners of the show. Delamar is a fellow Kapuso; she has a show on Q aired every Saturday.
ahaha! okei! (~~,)
chico, nsan na yung top 10 worst movie titles???
Again, thanks Loi for straightening that out for us! We knew naman that Ricky also only got it from the e-mail thing. It was the person who started spreading the e-mail without saying it’s from then show that was a bit unfair. More than unfair to us, it’s unfair to the brilliant people who sent them in!
Kaye, it’s coming up soon!
yo! sir chico permission to post this top ten on my newly created blog (i dream of having a “world class,much visited,highly informative and very entertaining ” blog like yours) 🙂
I KNOW SUPER LATE REACTION NA TOH BUT THIS ONE IS REALLY FUNNY:
Bebang – “Tandaan mo anak ang batang sinungaling ay di na tatangkad, uusli ang ipin, liliit ang binti at tutubuan ng nunal sa mukha.” – Diosdado Macapagal
wow!!! di ko akalain na nakapasok pala yung noodle joke (#12) na sinend ko, hehehe..
sinend lang sa akin yan ng kaibigan ko dati, hehehe..
kakatuwa naman.. yan na ata pinakamabenta kong joke e, hehehe.
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