Old Maid was my favorite card game when I was young. I never really understood what it meant until I was much older. The stereotypical spinster is usually described as a cranky, unpleasant, old crone who hates life and everything in it. But in this day and age, the era of the independent women, there are those who stay unmarried by choice. Maybe out of an objective objection to the marital set-up, to a simple lack of potential candidates. I don’t see anything wrong with staying unmarried. Committing to a life together with someone only works if you find the right person to do it with. They should make the term more politically correct. Maybe instead of old maid, we should call them, “unmarried persons”, since men grow old alone too.
February 27, 2009 → The Top Ten Signs That You’ve Become An Old Maid – Shotz
- Langgam – Whe you find yourself praying: “Sige na Lord, kahit sino na, basta mabait…”
- Maomao – Before you used to get a massage to relax your muscles, now you get a massage because it’s the only chance you get to have a man’s hands on your body.
- RC and Cess – Kapag kinukupkop ka na ng kapatid mo na tumira na lang sa kanila at alagaan ang mga pamangkin mo.
- Tonsky – If your idea of a busy weekend is Tai Chi in Luneta then taking care of your nephews after.
- DontCurseMe – If you live with your 3 old maid aunts.
- Lonely Seagirl – When you say, “I have a date tonight”, you actually mean you’re watching a movie with relatives.
- No name – When you say, “my kids”, you’re referring to your potted plants.
- Ms. Vain – Pag mahilig ka na sa ube. (CHICO: Hey! Ube happens to be my favorite ice cream flavor! Hmph.)
- Jonathan - If you’re on the MRT and you start shouting: “Manghihipo! Manghihipo!” And when the guys says: “Hindi naman kita hinihipuan ah!” You say: “Eto naman, para nagsu-suggest lang!”
- Eylek – If for Christmas you get the following gifts: cross stitch, rocking chair, balabal.
- No name – Kung may nahanap kang expiry date sa poocheech mo.
- Myuki – If you tell yourself: “Meron naman vibra mode…”
- Maomao – If you plan for the future with only yourself in mind.
- Abernathy – If people start asking: “Are you sure you’re not lesbian?”
- Urduja – If you say stuff like: “I like children, as long as they’re not mine.”
- Incognito/Lolo Ben – If you graduate from Singles For Christ, to Handmaids of the Lord.
- Hopeless Jec – Kapag ang mga pinapa-date sa iyo ng mga kaibigan mo, kundi biyudo, hiwalay sa asawa.
- Astroboy – When kisses from men start feeling like charity.
- PC Konek – If the only person who tells you to, “spread ‘em”, is your OB-GYN.
- Jockaz – Pag niyayaya ka na ng mga amiga ng nanay mo na sumali sa ballroom dancing nila.
- Tinidor de Libro – If the beneficiaries of all your insurance policies are always your nieces and nephews.
- Draco’s Biatch – Pag nagi-ipon ka na ng tupperware at bedsheet.
- Javipot – You’re single but they stop calling you during the bouquet toss.
- Gooey Kablooey – If all your dates say: “Kumusta na PO kayo…”
- Garfield – You say stuff like: “I don’t need a man to make me happy.”
- Loi Pogi – After a date, yung guy imbes na nagki-kiss, nagma-mano!
- No name – If your sister gets you as her “Old Maid of Honor” on her wedding.
- Billie – You start naming your cats the names you were reserving for your future kids.
