The Best And The Rest 160

Kids nowadays are so smart.  Sometimes, too smart for their own good.  They say never to talk to kids as if you were talking to kids.  Talk to them the way you’d talk to an adult; you’d be surprised at the results.

December 2, 2008 → The Top Ten Smartest Thing You Ever Heard A Kid Say – BuchoCgirl06

1. No name – I was drilling my 5-year-old son for his spelling contest. I told him to spell “axes”. He said, “I dont know if you want A-X-E-S or A-C-C-E-S-S.”
2. SC – I have a 7-year-0ld nephew who was watching Barney. After a while, he said: “There are no purple dinosaurs.”
3. Bulakeña – I’ve been a widow for 6 years. One time my kids asked: “Mommy, bakit di ka pa mag-asawa?” I answered: “Kasi mga bata pa kayo.” They countered: “Hindi naman kami ang maga-asawa eh…ikaw.”
4. SPY Shadow – My neighbor’s kid proudly brags to his playmates: “My 4-year-old sister can spell her name backwards: Anna.”
5. Jesse – My 5-year-old son David was very sick yesterday, so my wife said to him: “Sana ako na lang may sakit.” David said: “Hindi mama, dapat wala tayo sakit lahat.”
6. No name/His Cuteness – Nanay: “Anak, mahiya ka naman, linis ako ng linis tapos ikaw puro laro ka lang!” Anak: “Mas nakakahiya naman yata kung ako ang naglilinis at ikaw ang naglalaro…”
7. Lissadelvalle – My son and I just missed the closing of Bread Talk, so I said: “Sorry anak, wala nang bread.” He said to me: “Eh di mag-talk nalang tayo.”
8. Mac1 – I was talking on the phone with my wife. After, I noticed that our 5-year-old son was listening and said to me: “Sinong kausap mo, asawa mo?”
9. Time Traveler’s Wife – I saw a pasa on my 5-year-old niece’s leg, and I said: “What’s that?” She answered: “Oh…it’s a HEMATOMA.”
10. No name – A little girl asked: “Mommy, why do you have some white hair?” The mommy answered, “Each time you do something bad, a strand of white hair grows.” Then the little girl asked: “Then why is ALL of grandma’s hair white?”
11. Getitreal – I was asking my cousin if “commitment” was spelled with 1 or 2 T’s. A younger cousin butted in: “Gawin mo nang tatlo para sigurado!”
12. Aeon – I told my 6-year-old nephew that babies are made by the birds and the bees. He said: “Talaga? Akala ko sperm cell at egg cell?”
13. His Cuteness – My sister was telling her daughter: “Kainin mo na food mo, ang daming batang gustong kumain, pero walang makain!” Her daughter answered: “Eh di ibigay mo sa kanila yung ayaw kong kainin!”
14. Carlos’ Mom – We were visiting my late dad at the cemetery and I told my sons to ask for guidance from their Lolo because he was very wise. My 8-year-old said: “He’s not so smart. He ate too much sweets and now he’s dead.”
15. Dark Choco Boi – A friend’s student asked: “Bakit tinawag na orange yung prutas na orange?” My friend answered: “Kasi kulay orange.” The student countered: “Eh bakit ang apple hindi tinawag na red?”
16. No name – Sinita ng mama ko yung pinsan kong lalake dahil inaaway niya yung babae kong pinsan. Sabi ng mama ko: “Ang lalaki hindi dapat pumapatol sa babae.” Sabi ng pinsan ko: “Hello, ang pumapatol sa lalake, bakla!”
17. Geyp – Dad: “The only word in the English language that starts with ‘SU’ but is pronounced as ‘SH’ is ’sugar’.” Son: “Sure…”
18. No name – I told my niece: “Finish your food! Ang daming batang nagugutom!” She answered: “This is GLUTTONY…”
19. No name – My friend’s 3-year-old kid saw her parents getting dressed. She said: “Uuuy…si daddy…iki-kiss ang dede ni mommy!”
20. No name – My 4-year-old son, was taught never to fight with girls. So when he was being bullied by this little girl, he told her: “I have 2 word for you…BREATH MINTS.”
21. JoTad – Our Ilokano yaya was planning to put up her own canteen. When she asked for name suggestions, my eldest blurted out: “I know, PAGOODFOOD!”
22. Ang Manunusok – My 4-year-old cousin wanted to walk with us on the beach. I told him: “Magpaalam ka muna sa mommy mo.” He waved at his mom and said: “Mommy, paalam!”
23. Yñaki – When my brother asked his son what he wanted from Santa one Christmas his sone shouted: “BMX BIKE AND LASER SWORD!!!” My bro told him: “Don’t shout, Santa’s not deaf.” His son answered: “I know, but Lolo is.”
24. Kate – I told my daughter: “Mamaya pa tayo aalis, pinapalamig ko lang itong coffee ko.” She answered: “Bakit mo pa pinakulo, kung palalamigin mo lang pala?”
25. Joperman/Aya – My sister was explaining to her 3-year-old son that she spanked him because she loved him. After the talk, the kid slapped her and said: “I love you too.”