Kawasan Falls

On our last day, we wisely and foolishly decided to finally visit Kawasan Falls, located in the town next to Moalboal, Badian.  The last time we were in Moalboal, everyone was telling us to go to Kawasan Falls.  But not being a big waterfalls fan, it was never high on our priority list.  But wisely, we finally relented; and foolishly because we put it off until the very last minute.  We had to wake up extra early to be able to make it back in time for the check out (lunch time), and boy, did we misjudge the travel time.  The tricycle driver told us it would take about 40 minutes to get there.  NOT! It was a good hour and so-and-so minutes!

Once you get there, you “have to” get guides to take you to the falls, although seriously you don’t need guides because there’s just one trail that leads straight to the falls.  But anyway, I guess it’s part of the deal.  Plus, it’s okay because one guide volunteered to carry my heavy tripod for me.  The initial panic that set in because we were off-sked so early in the day, soon turned into a more serene demeanor since the short 15-20 minute trek was really pleasant.  The babbling brook (or stream or creek or rivulet) is always on one side and the gurgling sound it makes immediately puts you at ease.  And we were told that during rains, no one is allowed on the trail because the water overflows and sinks the whole place!   We were also glad that we went on a Tuesday morning, so very few people were expected to visit.

When we finally got there, the falls did not disappoint.  It was majestic and quite beautiful to behold.  Apparently this was just the first of 3 falls.  The one at the bottom is the largest, and the higher you go, the smaller the falls and the purer the water.  In fact, they say that the water at the source, the topmost falls, is supposedly so clean that you can drink as much as you want without fear of contracting any disease or parasites. Keyword: SUPPOSEDLY.  But we never got to the other 2 falls because it would entail further trekking and we just didn’t have the time.

But of course, the more downstream you go, the dirtier the water gets.  In fact, not far from the main falls, I caught this laundry scene.  I hope they just got water and will rinse elsewhere, because it would be a shame to pollute the clear waters with detergent and dirty soap suds, carrying libag and other sundry bodily grime.

The main event is the balsa or raft ride.  Basically you rent it for about 300 pesos, and they’ll bring you to the falls as you are bathed, or more like pummeled, by the hammering waters of the falls.  Like I said, I’m not a big fan of waterfalls, but I must admit, it was loads of fun once you’re there!  My main problem was, I told myself I wouldn’t swim.  I love swimming in the salty sea brine, but I’m not into swimming in fresh water like in lakes or rivers.  So in short, I didn’t bring any swimwear.  Everyone said I could just wear my boxers, if I didn’t mind parading my wet look once we go under the falls.  What the heck.

I had to use my mobile phone inside a waterproof case to take this picture.  Of course I had to edit the photo first.  I refuse to post nipple and belly button shots of myself, especially my revealing choice of swimwear.  The grimace was because the water felt like toppling bricks, given the intense momentum of the raging waters.  The water falls from a great height, so it’s quite painful to bear the full brunt of the falls.  My skin was red with the pelting it received, but admittedly, it was really fun.  When you’re in a place like this, you become a kid again for a couple of minutes.

Inasmuch as we would’ve loved to stay and swim and lounge around and have lunch and stuff, we had to skedaddle because we were a good 4-5 hours away from the airport and we needed to hustle.  So we dried off, and trekked back to where the trikes are parked.  The stroll back was just as pleasant, but there were substantially more tourists going up as there were going down.  Had we gone a little later, we wouldn’t have enjoyed as much with all those people there.

I’m glad we went despite the hectic trip home.  I usually just like taking pictures of waterfalls, not really swimming in them.  But after that, I have a renewed appreciation of waterfalls and it’s infinite pleasures.  I’d like to go back, next time to trek to the 2 other falls, and to frolic longer under the falling waters of Kawasan.

Moalboal Redux

Moalboal is the first destination we repeated since we liked our stay so much last November.  So when I went on leave 2 weekends ago, we went back to the same place, same resort, for some sand, surf, and lots of RnR.  I didn’t get to take as many photos as I’d like because we ended up sleeping and snorkeling most of the time.  It was probably the longest I’ve been in the water.  I was just soaking until ALL my body parts were pruney (some more then others).

I really tried to take as much pictures as I can, but we were so activity-based the whole time that I hardly had time to lug my trusty camera along.  On the first day we just lounged around and ate and napped and did nothing.  The second day we basically stayed in the water pretty much from sun-up to sun-down.  And on the third day, the most hectic of all, we went to Kawasan Falls (which I will write about next post), squeezing all that before going home lunch time.  It was pretty much a pocket-vacation.  If our holiday was a person, he’d be a preemie, it’s all over even before it started.

On our first night, I even attempted to shoot star trails for the first time.  It was an abysmal flop.  All the shots were noisy and they didn’t look like star trails at all.  Plus, the Sunday we were there didn’t have as many beachcombers as the last time.  Locals explained that the day before was Valentines Day, so most people had all-nighters at various discos (yes, that’s what they them), as they romanced their paramours till the break of dawn.  So few people would still have the energy to romp around the sandy shores as they usually would on a weekend.

We even heard there was a shooting at the other beach, Panagsama, which seemed like a rubout.  Apparently, the guy had a lot of enemies, and at the entrance to one of the discos, someone was waiting for him and he got 2 slugs pumped into him at close range.  Incredibly, he survived, but won’t for long unless he gets surgery asap, which he couldn’t since budget was a problem.  The small town was abuzz with the news.  At every turn our tricycle driver would stop and either receive or deliver the latest on the shooting.

This vacation felt way shorter than the others.  It’s like we still wanted to do so much more.  They way to go is 5 days, 4 nights, but with only 10 leaves in a year, I need to be thrifty with my vacay days.  Anyway, tell you about Kawasan Falls tomorrow.

The Best And The Rest 112

Hell means many things to many people.  The idea that hell is not one specific thing that appears the same to everyone, but instead tailor-fit to the individual crimes, is frighteningly sweet.  Sweet because your enemies will be punished according to their transgressions, frightening because so will you.

August 25, 2008 → The Top Ten Signs That You’re In Hell – Astroboy

1. Dru – People do a double take when they see your 36-C boobies…but you’re a man.
2. Your Highness – My friend, who met a vehicular accident while under heavy liquor intoxication, went through hell when he was operated on w/o anesthesia!
3. SC – During st0rmy days, having to go through floods, smelling of the w0nderful mix 0f garbage & rat pee.
4. Michael – Falling in love with a hopeless cheater.
5. Raymond – Giving office tours to several batches of school groups who aren’t interested in listening.
6. Richie Rich - When your husband falsely accused you of cheating and he intentionally emailed your naked photos to all your guy friends just to hurt you back.
7. Kresha – My cousin was in hell when her husband came home on payday and told her that he lost all his earnings in a cockfight instead of buying milk for the baby.
8. Dru – If you’re alone in your room, feeling very frisky, and the only magazine you have is Piggery Today.
9. Casbah – Quitting your job 3 days before your lifelong childhood crush joins your company, specifically the department you were heading.
10. Endemon – Having to go through 3 separations.  My mom split up with my dad when I was in grade school, she split up with my stepdad, the man she left my father for, and recently she split up with her 3rd “husband”.  Bad thing is, I actually loved all 3 “dads”.  And now I lost all of them.
11. Charles – Getting eczema on my “thing”.  Imagine the shame of having the doctors tell you, “You should wash this more often…”
12. Geneva – Having my dentures fall out during the high note in “How Do I Live”, as I performed in front of the entire university.  Imagine them falling at the part, “How do I ever, ever surviii…”
13. Egbert – Discovering after marriage that the woman you married is a major queefer.
14. Jarvis – 6 months ago, as I rushed inside my car because I was late for an impotant meeting, I ran over my beloved dog, killing her instantly, the very dog who’s been my closest companion for 12 tears now.
15. Lizbeth – My mom telling my crush that she works double time scrubbing my body odor from my shirts’ armpit areas.

Goodbye, Old Friend…

First of all, I haven’t been able to blog because of my ever-so-reliable ISP, with its faster-than-the-speed-of-light internet connection (am I being too subtle or do you hear the bitter drip of sarcasm in my tone?), conked out on me for the past 2 days.  It’s still shakey, they promised to get going on whatever the problem is in our area, so I write this without any guarantee that I’ll be able to post this.

Second, I’m an emotional wreck.  I finally decided to sell my beloved car, the same one I had since October 2003.  I still love it, it still runs great, no major problems, but I decided it’s time to say goodbye.  After telling my friend about my decision, he told me just yesterday that someone wanted to see it.  I said yes, and within an hour, he was calling me to say that someone wanted to pay already and take home the car!  My head was spinning! I thought someone would look at it, think about it for a week, then decide if they want it or not.  I was ready to sell the car, but not on the same day!  I asked for at least a one day extension, and they agreed.  Obviously I sold it dirt-cheap since they couldn’t wait to seal the deal.

I suppose this specific car is the MOST special to me, mainly because the memories I attach to this car are the most special to me.  I have more treasured memories in this car than all my other past cars combined.  Not so much the quantity, but the quality.  I swear, I’m such a sentimental wuss.  My spine turns to jello everytime I realize my car is gone.  I know it isn’t the case, but it’s as if the new owner has taken the memories away together with the car.  I guess I really have letting go issues.  I get so attached to things I love.  I can’t seem to accept the impermanence of everything.  Even something material like a car!

I’ve been the emotional equivalent of a whirling dervish on crack since yesterday.  But I guess I’ve calmed down a lot since the actual event.  I’ve been paid, the car is gone, the deal is done (although I still imagine my car crying buckets of tears in some strange alien garage, with no lights, screaming out for daddy and wondering what it did to deserve being abandoned).  Sigh, I guess this exercise is good for me.  I remember when I was young, around grade 1, when we left our old house in Cubao, I was crying the whole day, saying goodbye personally to each individual object, from the trees to the aircons, to the doors, to EVERYTHING.  So during times of goodbye, I can’t help but become that little boy again.

So goodbye Xtri (hahaha, I know, lame nickname, right?), my trusty jalopy, my good buddy, my partner in crime.  You were my car when things turned for the better for me.  I guess it’s one of my secret fears; that you are some sort of lucky charm, and that once your gone, the good stuff go with you.  I hope your new owners take good care of you.  May the gods of machinery watch over you always.  And should the time come that we pass each other on some busy avenue somewhere, and we see each other with someone new, no need for fanfare, no need for scandalous honking, no need for frantic windshield wiping…just flicker your headlights briefly, dim and quick enough for no one else to notice, but I will, and it’ll suffice for me to know that you miss me too.

Videos I Like 2

Again, I’ve come across some videos that I’d like to share.  These are ones that caught my attention:

This is one commercial we won’t be seeing on our TV screens.  Because of the Rihannagate scandal, Wrigley quickly dropped Chris Brown as their endorser and pulled out all ads that included the fallen R&B star.  What a shame since “Forever” is the first hit song that I know of that had a sly endorsement even before it was released.  I noticed the line, “double the pleasure, double the fun” in the Top Ten hit song even before I found out that it was connected to the gum brand.  So unfortunate for everyone concerned.

Chris Brown Doublemint Ad

In the same vein as the Mercedes dumb blonde ad, this is another commercial that really amused me.  The actress was so good and she reminds me of a bigger-boobed, dumber version of Rachel Griffiths of Six Feet Under.

Nando’s Ad

I love the song “Just Dance”, I love John Mayer, I love Ellen DeGeneres.  So what better combo than adding all three into a really cute skit?

“Just Dance” by John Mayer & Ellen DeGeneres

Did you ever wonder what happens when a bird hits a plane’s engine?  The phenomenon is known in the aviation industry as a “bird strike”.  It was the known cause of the plane that crashed in the New York river as well as some problems in local airlines.  Well, they did an experiment and this is what happens.  Scary.

Bird vs. Plane

This is an actual footage of what 2 news anhcors do during a break in the newscast.  So amusing to know that severely serious news anchors have a keen sense of humor too.

Anchors Aweigh!

The Best And The Rest 111

Being Filipino in an English-speaking FM station has its challenges.  No matter how proficient you may be, unless you were born somewhere else, many thoughts are still formed using the native tongue.  And often we broadcasters find ourselves grasping at the choice of word when no one English word suffices to translate the Tagalog thought.  Some translations fit halfway, some seem ungainly, while some are simply wrong.  So it’s actually a fun challenge to try and find the exact, if any, translations to these words.

August 22, 2008 → The Top Ten Tagalog Words Or Phrases That Don’t Have English Translations

1. Paul – Tsi-tsinelasin kit!
2. Teacher Liez – Neknek mo!
3. Sayuri/Doc Yammy/Ingrid – Puwera usog
4. Mama Rosa – Tampo
5. Prettysexy – Pasaway
6. Andrei/Mrs. Crap/Spongebob/Pols/Medkid – Pasma
7. Brad/Twylyt – Kulit
8. Corics – Malasakit
9. Car Park – Bitin (as in, “bitin yung pelikula”)
10. Slither Dude – Mali-mali
11. Yego – Ano ka, hilo?
12. Sayuri – Kuyakoy
13. Nikaniks and Pawpaw/The Game/Silver Bird – Baduy
14. Nikaniks and Pawpaw/Sayuri/Soulsifter – Sukob
15. Ray/Jun13 – Umay
16. Annabanana/Gorgeous Bitch – Sablay
17. No name – Komang
18. No name – Gigil
19. Roxy/Pluralized Lighting – Kuya/Ate
20. Silver – Puyat
21. SC – Ngongo
22. Kbear – Kilig
23. Xtra Rice – Jologs
24. Kobe Kong – Sutsot
25. Kai – Torpe
26. Kobe Kang – Jayveenjava – Nangingilo
27. Kobe Kang/Burnik – Hiyang
28. Kobe Kang – Banlag
29. Chuckie – Gago
30. Karl Marx/Chuchay – Pakikisama
31. - Kalabit
32. Laya/Miles – Pinaglihi
33. Pangit Hilton – Basta
34. No name – Pasalubong
35. Law Stud – Sumbat

I Hope You Dance

One fringe benefit of watching American Idol is getting to know songs that would otherwise remain undiscovered.  One such case was when Carrie Underwood sang “God Bless The Broken Road” by Rascal Flatts.  I really love what the song is saying, and I would never have come across it had she not performed it.  I’m not a big fan of country music, although I do have a healthy sampling of country songs in my iPod.

Well, it happened again.  During Hollywood week, one of my favorites, Danny Gokey, sang a song that caught my attention, even though I only heard a couple of lines.  Then it turned out that it was one of the most sung audition pieces this year.  So it really got me curious, how a song is so popular with the contestants, yet it was completely unfamiliar to me.  So I had to catch a replay, wrote down a parcel of the lyrics and googled it.

Turns out, the title of the song is, “I Hope You Dance”, originally done by Lee Ann Womack feat. Sons of the Desert, a number 1 country single in 2000, and also cracking the Hot 100 where it peaked at number 14.  It was also nominated for Song of the Year in the 2000 Grammys, but lost to U2’s “Beautiful Day”.  When I read the lyrics, I ended up loving it even more.

I Hope You Dance – Lee Ann Womack

(Written by: Mark D. Sanders/Tia Sillers)

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat
But always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you’ll give faith a fighting chance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances
But they’re worth taking
Lovin’ might be a mistake
But it’s worth making
Don’t let some hell bent heart
Leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out
Reconsider
Give the heavens above
More than just a passing glance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)

I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you’ll give faith a fighting chance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
Dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
I hope you dance
(Where those years have gone)

(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)

I really hate going sappy and wearing my heart on my sleeve, but I’m really in a trying zone, so I’m the perfect market for songs like these that lift your spirit because it speaks a truth that speaks to you.  It’s as if the writers read my biography and wrote a song based on what they saw.  I love part that goes, “Never settle for the path of least resistance”.  Is it midlife crisis?  Andropause?  Who knows.  If I see an oasis, I’ll get down on my knees and drink.

And as if to add icing and a cherry on top, I found out that my favorite, Carrie Underwood, has a cover version of this country classic from an early unreleased pre-Idol album.  Unfortunately, most copies of the song are cut in the middle.  So instead, I’m posting a version of Ronan Keating.  Just sharing.

And Danny Gokey’s version as well.

The best And The Rest 110

I’m back!  Hope fully I get to post my new pictures soon.  I haven’t even uploaded my photos into my computer, so I’m not doing good time.  But for now, I got the latest Top Ten post (Yay, we’re in August!)  Bad manners may vary depending on cultures, like burping is bad manners in some countries, good manners in others.  But some, are universal.

August 21, 2008 → The Top Ten Bad Manners – Kytes

1. Hookworm – I once saw a guy who was cleaning up after work. He washed his feet first before he washed his face.
2. Pluralized Lighting – It’s bad manners when people sneeze in their hands then they wipe it on MRT handles.
3. Billog/Soc Turbo/Pyxcel/Reyna – Men who adjust their crotches in public.  We once told off an officemate who constantly adjusted himself in front of everybody.  He simply said, “May naiipit eh.” Worse, if they smell it after.
4. Ian – People who press all the buttons on an elevator so it stops on all floors.
5. Ynaki – When people borrow something from you then lend it to others as well.
6. Urduja – On a jeep, I asked the driver to please stop smoking because the smoke was going straight to me.  He gave me back my money then said, “Bumaba ka na!”
7. Jun13 – In internet cafes, when people watch your monitor to see what your surfing.  Worse, when they read your YM chats over your shoulder.
8. Kid Bukid – When you watch a breastfeeding mom with malice in your eyes.
9. Astroboy – One of our foreign partner employers uses the temples of his glasses to stir his coffee all the time! Eeew!
10. Highjumper – I find it really rude when people talk in a different dialect or language when they are with me.
11. No name – People who double dip.
12. PUTUNGTUNGS DAD – Yung umiihi sa gulong ng kotse.
13. Leiacutie – When someone plays w/ his toes, then smelling the hand after.
14. Steph – Once in the LRT, I saw a guy scraping his sweat and libag off using his LRT card. Now I only ride the LRT if I really need to.
15. Fat-free – A senator cleans his eyeglasses by putting it in his mouth, licks it, then wipes the saliva off w/ his barong.
16. Doorknob – People who, when seeing you on your way out, suddenly asks for a ride, then makes you WAIT!
17. Sayuri – Sleeping immediately once the “deed” is d0ne.
18. Strangely beauty – My parents hate it when they speak to me in Chinese and I answer back in English.
19. Mr. Yman – Teenagers in our parish who goes to simbang labas every Sunday.
20. Chessica Alba – Passengers who put their feet up on the dashboard.
21. Jose de vengenge – People begging for money while you’re eating in a resto.
22. Sayuri – Talking about your present sex life with past girlfriends.
23. Topaz – When people discuss off-topic stuff outside of the egroup’s objectives.
24. Mangjose – One time I got spit on by someone in a van while I was biking through traffic. Dumura siya just as I was passing his window.
25. Orion - If you’re a guest in someone’s house, it’s bad manners to wipe the plate and utensils with tissue when you’re at the dinner table.
26. Tuna Belly – My sister-in-law/boss leaves her used tissues filled with sipon inside my car, for me to dispose of.
27. Topaz – It’s bad manners to ask officemates to compare bonuses.
28. Mangjose – There is nothing wrong with people eating with their bare hands, but while eating fish, tapos makikisawsaw siya sa toyo kalamansi mo? NAMAN!
29. Mr. Perk – People who borrow money and get mad when you ask them to pay.
30. Sayuri – Criticizing food in other people’s houses, especially pag nakikikain ka lang. Worse, if you instruct them how to cook it better.

Big Weekend

We’ve been adjusting since Monday last week, when we started our spankin’ new 4-hour sked, and what a way to end our first week  doing four hours!  The last 3 days were fully-packed like anything.

HEY MONDAY ON THURSDAY

We were supposed to interview Hey Monday, the opening band of Fall Out Boy’s Manila concert, last Thursday, but they got caught up and arrived a little after 10am.  Jude and Gelli ended up interviewing the young band, but I was able to get my picture taken with them.  Just the day before, Boyce Avenue also dropped by, but I wasn’t able to get a photo taken with them.

MADAM AMBASSADOR, TAKE 2

We were so happy to have on the show, for the 2nd time, the Ambassador of the United States of America to the Philippines, Ambassador Kristie Kenney.  The first time she joined us on the show was during Thanksgiving of 2007! That was around the same time I started my blog.  I distinctly remember that I mentioned her visit in one of my earliest posts, my third if I’m not mistaken, but I wasn’t able to post any pictures from that meeting.

So now, we were thrilled to have her back, this time for Valentine’s Day.  She was so sweet, she even brought a whole lot of cookies and other sweets for the Rx staff.  She said she had “a little help” with the baking, but that it was mostly her handiwork.

We also got to talk about the new American president, Barack Obama, the ambassador’s new blog, and even squeezed a promise out of her to add us on her Facebook!  I swear she’s such a cool personality.  If we weren’t careful, we could easily forget that we’re with a foreign dignitary because she was so much fun to be with.  A lot of the RX staff came extra early to meet the ambassador and to have their picture taken with her.

Then later that same day, was the RX Color-coded Singles Party which was such a big hit!  I know it sound odd, coming from us, but seriously, there was a long line getting into the club until 3am!  We were pooped with only about an hour to sleep until it’s time for work the next day,

VALENTINES WITH OUR ST. PAUL GIRLS

With barely an hour of sleep, we got up early because as I posted in this blog, we were doing a new twist to an old concept.  We did love messages on air, but to be read by our grade school students from St. Paul College Pasig.  The girls ranged from grade 3 to grade 7.  Our girls did us all proud by stepping up to the challenge and performing way better than we ever expected.  They were so nervous and they weren’t given much time to rehearse or prepare for their on-air debut, but they didn’t buckle under the pressure, with some even exceeding our wildest expectations!  It was so cute hearing little girls reading grown-up messages for Valentines.  But some of them also had a chance to read their Valentine messages for their love ones, like their brother, their mom, their dad, their yaya, even their dead pet.  It was handful managing 20 young girls in a confined space, but we survived it. (By the way, thank you so much for the overhelming response for our call-out for love messages to be used in the special.  We felt so bad chooshing only a few, but we only had 3 hours worth of greetings and songs.  So if you’d like to read all of the messages, just read the comments from the post, “Valentine Special 2009″.)

But by the time we were done, we were practically crashing.  That’s why I’m on holiday as we speak.

The Best And The Rest 109

In general, the 2 topics we stay away from, not because we have nothing to say about it, in fact we a LOT to say about it, are politics and religion.  Not that we don’t want a discussion, but more because there’s way too much to say about the topic.  The problem with tackling these 2 topics on an morning FM radio show is that it instantly polarizes the people listening.  Plus, people are so intense with their opinions on these topics that it’s impossible to get to a common ground.  We tried, but we ended up with a bunch of irate people who couldn’t let it go and move on.  Maybe if we had a full talk show, like in an AM setting, we’d have more time to tackle such a big topic.  But every now and then, we poke, we nudge, we dance around this delicate topic.

August 19, 2008 → The Top Ten Church Moments Or Quotes – Jose De Vengenge

1. Em-em Unggoy - A small girl felt sick during mass and felt like throwing up. Her mom told her to go outside. She did and was back feeling better. Mom asked: “Saan ka sumuka?” Girl: “Dun sa gilid, sa box na nakalagay ‘For The Sick’.”
2. Ian024 - We had a company anniversary mass. My officemate called me to go down and see the mass because there was an attendance sheet. I got offended by it and stayed in the office.
3. Marcus - Man was praying in church for God to give him P1000. The town mayor who was also in church overheard him and was so moved with pity that he gave the man P500 only which was all he had in his pocket. When the mayor left the man went back to praying: “Lord Salamat po. Pero next time pag bibigyan niyo ko ng pera, wag niyo na po padaanin kay Mayor.”
4. Daryl – One time our priest was giving a passionate serm0n about how God doesn’t appr0ve of gays and cohab. Tinginan kami ng mga kabarkada ko (we’re 4 gays and 1 lesbo).
5. Maynman - One time when I was a kid, I insisted on eating candy during mass despite my parents telling me not to. The homily’s message was fittingly about obeying one’s parents. The candy got stuck in my throat and I began to choke. We had to go to the hospital and never finished the mass. Needless to say, I learned my lesson.
6. Astroboy – I read this in our church prayer b0x: “Dear G0d, thanks for the baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy.”
7. Lara - During consecration, when all was quiet after the bell was rang, my 2-year-old sister said loudly, “Hello?”
8. Astroboy – During Sunday school, the kids were asked if there’s a c0mmandment that teaches how to treat their siblings. A little girl answered, “Th0u shall n0t kill?”
9. Dru – When it stopped raining as they left church, my inaanak said, “Naubusan ng tubig si Jesus…”
10. Padpaper – One time the priest made everyone jump in their seats when he said, “Ano ba nangyayari sa society ngayon, puro na lang SECTS, SECTS, SECTS!”
11. Nikki – My dad was in our parish when he noticed an elderly lay minister praying the Stations of the Cross backwards, i.e., from 14th Station to the 1st. My dad said: “Brod, mukhang paatras po ang dasal natin ah?” The lay minister said: “Ay sus! Kaya pala palakas ng palakas si Kristo!”
12. Strangelybeauty – When I was small, I was wondering why a lot of people get sleepy in church. My yaya said that whenever we go to church, there are small devils that pull on our eyelashes.
13. Jose de vengenge - Our pastor said in a sermon that the Olympics sign is satanic & that Christians should not join or even watch it. I walked out.
14. YñaKi- A reminder posted in a church said: “Please don’t leave your valuables unattended. The ones who find it might think its the answer to their prayers!”
15. Astroboy – During a church event, a sign was put near the basket of apples: “1 per person only. God is watching.” Someone posted another sign near the basket of pears: “Get as much as you want. God is watching the apples.”
16. Alle – At the end of his sermon, our pastor said in closing: “Let us all CLOSE our eyes, and sing the song, ‘OPEN MY EYES LORD’.”
17. RhachaeL_Leigh – During the homily, the priest said: “Sige nga, sino dito ang wlang kagalit?” Obviously, everyone kept their hands down except for a 95-year-old lady, who raised her hand. The priest said, “Aba! Gayahin niyo si lola, siya lang ang walang kagalit. Lola, sabihin niyo sa lahat kung bakit wala kayong kagalit?” The lola answered: “Patay na kasi ang mga walanghiya!”